In response to my male audience from last Sundays blog post who all loved it but also wanted to see a rule list for women on how to be classy, I have decided to fulfill that request in all fairness.
However........... for the men that read my last post and got all fired up and felt they needed to defend themselves, this post won't be in reference to you and how a lady should treat you. No, no, this post will be in representation of today's gentlemen looking for a classy lady. If you are a true modern day gentleman then my last post resulted in applaud from you, and I thank you. You clearly knew that that post was about all the less desirable type of men out there, rather than yourself, you gentleman you ;)
So, one thing that seems to be a bit of an issue according to men is that when it comes to modern day women, over the years, dating way back, we have pushed and pushed for gender equality, and we have since succeeded. Women nowadays strive to be independent as much as possible, to be leaders, to bring home the 'bacon' , and to basically play all roles whether it's at work, in a family setting, or a romantically involved relationship. We have pushed to get here, and now that we have it we miss the old days of lives where roles were a bit more different, where we were courted properly, taken care of, and swept off our feet in blissful romances. So how we do find a balance? How do we modify these new age rules and satisfy both genders? How can we make the men feel more like men, the women feel more like women, all while maintaining some sense of equality in these relationships?
I don't have the answers to that but I do know that if we can all just become a little smarter and more in tune with recognizing certain traits of the opposite sex, then we will be able to better identify these differences , thus finding that modern day gentleman, or lady.
One problem I hear men complaining of is how women can tend to be all about money, or 'gold-diggers' if you will, and that is a very fair point made, especially living here in Calgary. It's true. There are a lot of women like that. Just as there are a lot of 'assholes' here who play multiple women at the same time. You're going to find that anywhere I think. However, when it comes to the comparison of a 'gold-digger' versus an act of being gentlemanly or ladylike , I think that's like comparing apples to oranges. 'Gold-diggers', in my opinion, are not a representation of a woman's manners, etiquette, appearance, or romantic behaviour. If a woman is all about money, although shallow or desperate to have the sole need for being taken care of financially doesn't mean she doesn't know how to conduct herself as a lady, have manners, or be kind to people. Do I agree with women like that? No. That's not my thing, personally. I hold value in other areas. But I would imagine it would be fairly easy to find out within the first date or two, no? In which at that point, as soon as your recognize it, bail out of that relationship right away, just as we have to when we recognize a man is an 'asshole'. Do we always ? Absolutely not. Us women can be notorious for staying with men like that simply because we fall into a slump, start making excuses, and convince ourselves it's normal and that we are in fact in love.
Which brings me to my next point.....men are saying that us women lead them on making them think we are interested when in fact we are not. Sure , there are situations where both men and women do this, BUT for the most part I'm going to have to be on the women's side here for a minute...and this is where the classy lady part comes in. Let's use myself for example, I am a very friendly woman. I have manners, I have respect for people, I like being generous when I can and I am kind. To everyone ( unless you give me a reason not to be). I find it frustrating when my niceness gets confused for me being romantically interested in someone. If I'm interested in becoming anything more, I will let him know. So being polite and kind, as a lady should be, can sometimes come off in other ways to men, and so I believe that that may be the reason why someone feel a need to be a bit more harsh or cold as to not give the wrong impression. My advice to men with this one, if you're ever unsure, just outright ask. Don't beat around the bush. Be straight forward and put it out there. You'll have your answer, and a lot less if a headache wondering about it.
More feedback I've received is that women will try hard to have the appearance of a classy lady but then totally ruin it because their personality or way of words are just downright ugly. Or even their actions. Ladies, putting on a beautiful dress and doing your hair and makeup perfectly does not make you a lady! It's the person inside and your actions that do. The dress and jewelry are just to polish you and seal the whole package. I've heard from men, and sadly even witnessed myself some women who are dressed to the nines yet are spitting all over the sidewalks and cursing like a sailor as they walk along in their high heels. Not sexy or classy at all. Don't get me wrong, I'm no angel. I do curse but there is a time and place for everything my lovely ladies. And so, just in case we forgot or need a refresher, here is the modern rules for being a lady, as per requested.
Rules Of A Modern Day Lady
1. Always dress like you're going to meet your worst enemy.
2. Always be classy. Never trashy. Just a little nasty.
3. Respect yourself. If you don't, he won't either.
4. Stop comparing yourself to others.
5. Be happy with what you've got.
6. Confidence is sexy.
7. If he doesn't chase you when you walk away, then keep walking.
8. Cinderella didn't need to take off her dress to get her Prince Charming, and neither do you.
9. Respect the people who find time for you in their busy schedules. But love those who never look at their schedules when you really need them.
10. Acting dumb isn't cute. Intelligence is hot.
11. It might seem the hardest thing to do, but forget about the guy who forgot about you.
12. Make him chase you. Play hard to get sometimes.
13. Never change for anyone but yourself.
14. Be the woman a man needs, not the woman who needs a man.
15. Your dress should be tight enough to show you're a woman and loose enough to show your a lady.
16. Never apologize for what you feel. It's like saying sorry for being real.
17. Giving up doesn't mean you're weak. Sometimes it means you're strong enough to let go.
18. If you love someone, tell them, before it's too late.
19. Act like a lady, think like a man.
20. Never underestimate the power of a name. Use them. Be remembered.
21. Your smile is the sexiest curve on your entire body.
22. Never be reckless with his heart, and don't tolerate those who are reckless with yours.
23. Don't brag....too much.
24. A true lady doesn't start fights, but sure knows how to finish them.
25. Be approachable, have good posture, smile, and remember your manners.
26. Hold doors for everyone, especially older people or people carrying heavy things.
27. Have at least one outfit in the closet for a job interview, one for a first date, and one for going to see family (yours or someone else's) The amount of of headaches that can be spared by simply having a versatile blazer and pencil skirt at one's disposal are incalcuable.
28. Be a good hostess - learn how to make people feel comfortable and welcome in your house, and leave feeling like they got to be themselves.
29. Stop looking at marriage as the defining endeavor in a woman's life, no matter how much it has been ingrained into you. It should neither be something you actively disdain, nor something you seek out with white-knuckled deadlines.
30. Always have a back-up plan.
31. Give other women compliments when they are sincere and non-selfish, because girl-on-girl compliments are the greatest thing and a mark of a true lady.
32. Be the one to kiss first sometimes, and don't ever think that makes you weird or too forward. First kisses are too great a joy not to be shared by all genders.
33. You can never be overdressed or over educated.
34. If a man whistles at you, do not respond. You are a lady, not a dog.
35. Always cross your legs when wearing a skirt. Always.
36. A lady knows her limits no matter what. Stick to your guns. Hold your head high, but not your nose.
Sources : www.wattpad.com, pintertest.com, www.gallerybound.ca
No comments:
Post a Comment