A New Generation Of....."Gentlemen"

gent·le·man

ˈjentlmən/

noun

noun: gentleman; plural noun: gentlemen

1.

a chivalrous, courteous, or honorable man

 gentleman
 (n.) A man of calm demeanor, strong preserve, intellectual thinking, polite yet meaningful speak and a good upbringing. A fighter for the cause of right with words, not guns.

No matter how you look at it, no matter if it's a Webster definition or an UrbanDictionary definition, the word 'gentleman' is a universally understood word, and might I add as a woman, is a very appreciated one.

Working in the industries that I work in, I am constantly engaged in a lot of one on one conversation with people, women being a large part. I also have many girlfriends who attest to what I am blogging about today, single or not, because it's just that big of an 'epidemic' where even the most out of the loop, living under a rock individual would know of. Also men. Yep, their very own gender have been shamefully nodding their heads in agreement with the lack of gentlemen, or gentlemen qualities that are out there nowadays.

I'm constantly left scratching my head wondering what the hell is wrong with "men" these days and is it just going to continually get worse as years go by? Or will it be something like a fashion trend where perhaps gentlemen aren't "in" at the moment, but just like platform shoes, dark lipstick, and Hammer pants, they'll make a reappearance down the road again when the cycle of 'coolness' repeats? Thus the spawning of this post. Gentlemen....urban myth of the 21st century perhaps?

I'm not sure how it is in other parts of the world presently, but one thing I know for sure is that here, where I am, gentlemen or men with some gentleman-like qualities are a very rare find. As I mentioned before, in my line of work both as an RMT and as a Makeup Artist I talk to people all day. So you can imagine all the different conversations I engage in. Particularly with women. Some older, some a lot older, some the same age as I, and some younger. The common denominator? They all are confused and asking about the same thing....why are men these days so uncouth, so disrespectful, so inconsiderate, and lacking complete effort in courtship? Why don't men know how to properly approach a woman, how to date a woman, how to compliment, conversate and dine with a woman? In a world today where efficiency and convenience has become the name of the game, and where it's all about how to get things done faster, and cheaper, sadly I believe that this has transcended into the dating world. Our world has become so busy where we can't even make the time for someone anymore, not even for ourselves it seems, and so when it comes to dating, online dating websites and apps have become the more common method of finding that special someone.

Okay, so it takes the effort out of looking for someone, or approaching someone yourself in person and taking a risk right? It eliminates what some would call the "hassle" of dating. I personally love the serendipitous possibilities of romance, but hey, I'm a hopeless romantic, so what can ya do?

Then there is the first date. It could be a dinner and a movie type thing, it could even be something fun and interactive like mini golf or ice skating.....but......wait, we'll stop it right there for a minute......because this is precisely where a lot of problems seem to start from. Yes, it's sad that it's already right at the beginning, but it's true. Okay so what I'm hearing from many, many, many women (my own experiences included) is the complaint of this ; for a first date, the guy always suggests "Hey do you wanna come over and watch movies on my couch with me?". Oh. My. God. Alright, men who are reading this that don't see a problem with this at all?? You need a serious crash course in dating. First of all, asking a lady to come over and hang out on your couch with you is not a date. I repeat, it is not a date. We all know that even since Junior High, going over to someones house to watch movies is just code word for makeout/sex. So by all means, if that's your established goal between the two of you, then go for it, enjoy yourself! However if this is a woman you are wanting to impress, would it kill you to make some actual effort and plan a real date? Maybe hold the door open for her? Maybe treat her the first time instead of her treating you? Maybe try having some class? Maybe call her instead of texting her? Maybe try giving her an actual genuine compliment rather than "You turn me on" or "Your ass looks so good in those jeans"? Those are just a few 'maybes'. And to my male readers who are already experienced in how to act like a gentleman and do so, please don't take offense to any of this. This is directed to the ones out there (and let me tell you, there's lots!) who are either completely and utterly clueless or who simply just don't care! But really, you should care because gentlemen are the men who get noticed by all. They are the ones who will benefit in life in all sorts of different relationships and encounters, be it business related or personal. Many of the "men" out there today (and I use the word "men" very loosely on this one) are the complete opposite of the definition, and I honestly don't know if it's just that they weren't raised to be one and therefore don't know any better, or if they're afraid to be labeled a "wimp" or "gay" by their testosterone driven buddies, but whatever the reason is, it's enough to make a lot of us women stay single because we simply won't settle or lower our standards to date someone who has no manners, class, intelligence, and sincerity.

However, on the flip side, I do know that there are a lot of men out there who truly are awesome and know how to be true gentlemen, so we thank you for that. You are amazing. You are a rare find. Please don't ever change and please teach the others your ways. For those who haven't the slightest clue where to start, I've added a helpful lil' list just for you! You're welcome.

Wake us when the 'epidemic' is over.

Sincerely, Appreciative Women.

 

A Modern Gentleman's 30 Rules

1. Be gentle to the fairer sex, it's in the name.
2. Dress well no matter the occasion.
3. Pride is dangerous, be careful.
4. Be humble, be grateful.
5. Opening the door or giving a seat up for a lady isn't up for discussion.
6. Work hard.That is if you want to own anything worth having.
7. Starting/instigating a fight is for school boys, but men obtain the power to end one.
8. Ignorance isn't bliss. Knowledge is power.
9. Suit up. (Make sure they're tailored to fit) 
10. Confidence is a gentleman's trademark. 
11. Comfort zones are for the weak. Men aren't weak.
12. Foul language is for the less educated.
13. Make eye contact and mean business.
14. Lower your standards for no one.
15. Being romantic doesn't make you a woman.
16. Stay groomed.
17. Admit when you're wrong.
18. Always make the first move. You're the MAN.
19. Handwritten "Thank You" cards aren't "outdated". Use them.
20. Chivalry is not dead. There are just too many boys.
21. It is said you can tell a lot about a man by his handshake, so make it strong and firm.
22. Leave her breathless.
23. Judge no one, just improve yourself.
24. Speak your mind, don't hesitate.
25. Offer your arm to a lady while walking, they'll feel secure.
26. You're the man. You pay.
27. Women love compliments, gentlemen provide them.
28. Never wear your hat indoors, it's disrespectful.
29. Make sure everyone has their plate before you start eating.
30. We don't always have to be the center of attention, but we are always noticed. It is our signature as gentlemen to come, make a statement, leave, and be remembered.

Source : www.teachingmensfashion.com

1. Be gentle to the fairer sex, it's in the name.
2. Dress well no matter the occasion.
3. Pride is dangerous, be careful.
4. Be humble, be grateful - See more at: http://www.teachingmensfashion.com/3/post/2013/05/a-modern-gentlemans-30-rules.html#sthash.ivIerst4.dpuf

1. Be gentle to the fairer sex, it's in the name.
2. Dress well no matter the occasion.
3. Pride is dangerous, be careful.
4. Be humble, be grateful
5. Opening the door or giving up a seat for a lady isn't up
for discussion.
6. Work hard, that is if you want to own anything worth having
7. Starting / instigating a fight is for school boys, but men obtain the power to end one.
8. Ignorance isn't bliss, knowledge is power.
9. Suit up (make sure they're tailored to fit)
10. Confidence is a gentleman's trademark.
11. Comfort zones are for the weak, men aren't weak.
12. Foul language is for the less educated. - See more at: http://www.teachingmensfashion.com/3/post/2013/05/a-modern-gentlemans-30-rules.html#sthash.ivIerst4.dpuf

1. Be gentle to the fairer sex, it's in the name.
2. Dress well no matter the occasion.
3. Pride is dangerous, be careful.
4. Be humble, be grateful
5. Opening the door or giving up a seat for a lady isn't up
for discussion.
6. Work hard, that is if you want to own anything worth having
7. Starting / instigating a fight is for school boys, but men obtain the power to end one.
8. Ignorance isn't bliss, knowledge is power.
9. Suit up (make sure they're tailored to fit)
10. Confidence is a gentleman's trademark.
11. Comfort zones are for the weak, men aren't weak.
12. Foul language is for the less educated. - See more at: http://www.teachingmensfashion.com/3/post/2013/05/a-modern-gentlemans-30-rules.html#sthash.ivIerst4.dpuf